Anxiety - the brain freeze

Anxiety is a word that is commonly used and felt during Pandemic. It is true that we are living in this state of transition adapting to all sorts of new realities. 

First we had the lockdowns, we thought it was fantastic. It was a perfect time do things that we wouldn't normally do or we thought it was best time to rekindle dormant thoughts that we park in our minds in the past years. People rested well, spent time with their families, working from home was a perfect reality and we were thinking about doing something productive during the time at home. We thought about self improvement, like playing an instrument, reading books, cooking, gardening, exercising, building online friendships and romances etc. We also thought lockdown was something temporary, although COVID was becoming serious in other countries with the death rates piling up, we thought we were special. We were unbreakable, untouchable, blessed and in fact at one point we managed to get rid of the 'monstrous'   Corona from our country. Weren't we the fools to think that we can go back to our normal lives, then all of a sudden, surprise surprise, 'reality' made a dramatic comeback and gave us a reality check. It made us go back to lockdown and start all over, And this time we were forced to do it right.

The only thing that we can be certain during this time, ironically would be 'uncertainty'. Honestly, if you think about it, uncertainty has been always there in our lives. We have adapted well to counter it with our everyday routine and relationships. But now since both these elements have changed drastically, we cannot work well with the cancer 'uncertainty', we foster anxiety. Anxiety feeds into wide range of emotions that can lock you down even without the government stipulations. When we let it be, it manages to gain control over us, it will happily guide us into depression that would eventually bring us to thrive on committing murder upon ourselves. Some have actually stopped thinking about suicide because of the whole cremation or the burial issue. We have come to a stage where people can't even commit suicide if they want to. It is sad but true!

It was all the same to me, anxiety was becoming my new best friend. We had short but an intense relationship. In fact I thought anxiety was favoring me for some reason. It was becoming too attached not letting me go. Those were days of surviving and self learning. I took my time to reflect upon what was happening around me. Most importantly I realized that I become anxious about the things I cannot control. 

Interestingly Buddha has stated, 'Most of the Stress and anxiety comes from the way we respond, not the way life is. Adjust your attitude and all that extra stress would be gone' 

As a firm believer of faith and as a practitioner, I started to ponder on this. I reflected why it is necessary to take a step back and understand why I am stressing myself out. I attempted change my mindset and realign my responding mechanism. I can safely say anxiety took a hike leaving me a note even before I realized it.

Like every emotion 'anxiety' is simulated in our minds therefore we can only address it through reflection, understanding and taking action from our minds. It is all in our minds!

In conclusion, I'd like to leave this thought,

Indeed, with every hardship there is ease. (Quran 94:6)

It helps us realize that there's light out there, it is matter of finding it. 

Super Heroes in the Ordinary World - #4 Iron Lady aka Ninja Tigress

It's not easy to write about someone when you have a lot of information about that person, which you know should be captured but you also know that you have to pick and choose thus making it rather incomplete. Well, sadly this is one of those attempts, as this post might not do justice to the person at all.

Well this post is about, Thevuni aka Ninja Tigress, I met her long time ago - definitely feels a million years ago, when she was just a girl and I was just a boy. Now she's a young woman and I'm still a boy! - (at least that's what I'd like to think of myself).  Anyway the reason I decided to write a post about her is - simply because - She's super awesome. Of course, she's awesome for many reasons, I'd like to capture the top 7 things out of many I know of, as she attains her rightful place at the hall of fame of Super Heroes.

Reason #1 - Being True to Yourself

She's one of the few people I know who actually walks the talk and doesn't want to talk the walks. She always questions integrity and honesty within herself first, more than focusing on shortcomings of others. She believes in inside out approach that would constantly improve yourself as it keeps you in check. She firmly believes that 'world you create around you is a reflection of your own self'.

Reason # 2 - She has a big heart

Thevuni weighs about 45kg or probably less but everyone who knows her, knows that her heart weighs way more than that. Not in a literal sense but in a more emotional sense of course. She will fight with you, argue with you, get mad at you, but will be the first one to forgive and forget and then fight for you. Her ability to absorb people's grief is quite remarkable, sometimes she goes to the extent of destroying her own well-being just to be there for her friends and family.

Reason # 3 - She's a Huge Animal lover

People in this world can be ignorant or can easily be distracted by their own lack of understanding of compassion. But I learnt a lot about compassion by simply observing Thevuni's love towards animals. She often say that 'Animals have bigger hearts than people'. But then she counter argues by her own convictions, by being compassionate towards all humans. I don't know about animals or humans but I can definitely vouch for her.

Reason # 4 - Her Strong sense of Loyalty

She's one of the most loyal people you can find in this screwed up world. I've seen her do crazy things over this few years compromising her studies, her health, her safety and her life to be with the people that mattered to her the most. She traveled all by herself in a night bus for 10 hrs to be at an event in Ampara (East of Sri Lanka) just because she wanted to contribute, to do her job but most importantly to share the grief of her team mates as she knew work that needed to be done was challenging and absurdly hard. Well she didn't stop doing it once but continued to do it several times, almost jeopardizing her exams multiple times.

Reason # 5 - Not afraid to do the right thing

She's a genuine role model for ordinary women and men, as she's proven to the world that ordinary-average people can do exceptional things in life by simply being ordinary. But being ordinary is not easy, you need to learn to do the right thing. Of course right and wrong can be very subjective in the real world, but at least you need to learn to be 'fair in life'. 'Not Equality but equity' - that's her mantra.

Reason # 6 - Simplicity

'It's simple - Be simple. Be grounded, be humble. - that's the Bottom line' she says.

Reason # 7 - Girl power

She's a firm believer on girl power, and she resonates her beliefs through action. Simply put, she's not afraid to be a woman and to challenge all odds. Lets face it, we live in a world dominated by men, ruled by men, controlled by men and there's very little space for women to take lead, or even participate. So it is inspiring to see a young woman challenging the status-quo of the world, even by a small thing. And she does that - and that's it.

In conclusion, I'd like to state again that this post might be incomplete as it doesn't capture everything about Thevuni but it surely gives a damn good reason to be a Super Hero. I'm truly honored and inspired by Thevuni for her well deserved achievements, her loyalty and most importantly for being herself - Iron Lady.

Super Heroes in the Ordinary World - #3 Ultimate Lazman

So finally decided that I had some time to write about something, in this case somebody. Its not just somebody - the one and only Ultimate Lazman. His mother called him Larry and don't be fooled by his colour- he's a 100% Sri Lankan. This guy is quite instrumental in shaping my ideology to be a genuine human being. 

Some people are only good at inspiring through words not by action and some are good in coaching people but not being role models. This guy - Lazman - is an all rounder of all rounders, he walks the talk and a great life coach too. His positive vibes are the best vibes you can ask for on a rough day, not forgetting the Baileys. I've never met a person who can only talk about positive things - except Lazman. 

We often have deep conversation over a cup of tea or 'milk', almost every time it starts with a simple question - For an example,

Quite recently he asked me - 'So Ramzi How does it feel to be fasting - spiritually?' - There's no simple answer for that question because no one really have asked me that before. Generally people ask 'Are you hungry?' or they would say ' you must be thirsty' or they would simply assume that we cant even swallow saliva!

The first phase of our friendship was based on an introduction made to help him to conduct a mini conference. I met him several times since the introduction and one particular occasion was really stuck in my memory, where once we were having a conversation about the Future leaders conference that concluded in Ampara and I was explaining it to him that it was one of the roughest experiences I ever had in a while and I told him during this rough patch someone managed to steal 30,000 rupees from me. At that moment of time he slowly reached his pocket took a 20,000 rupee note collection and forces into my pocket. My reflexes are very slow so he managed to win. I know Lazman is not a Rich guy but He's definitely Rich at heart, What he told me that day was that 'Ramzi, Universe has a special way of giving back to me when I need money, So it is not a problem - you keep it. You need it more than I do.' I hope one day I could be generous as he is. - I wish.

He's inspiring in many ways, he in fact watched movies for his Masters degree. That, I think super cool thing to do. 

His wisdom through experience and coaching can be considered invaluable, Thank God I'm his friend, I get it for free!!
You are a true inspiration LAZMAN, only if you had a drive to run for President, - you will definitely be Mr.President. 

Love you to Melbourne and Back. <3 Be awesome as you are. 

I'm honoured to be your friend. But, For me, you are family.

Bird's eye View

"Swing low, sweet chariot
Coming for to carry me home,
Swing low, sweet chariot,
Coming for to carry me home."

If you haven't experienced the thrills of the 2003 rugby world cup finals then you wouldn't understand how important that song is to people. During that time I was supposed to study for my A/L exams but we couldn't resist an excellent game of rugby and of course an absorbing game of 'One Bump' cricket with my buddies back in the day. 
Last week I had the privilege of going to Johnny Wilkinson Country a.k.a England. Since I was a kid I was very interested in visiting the country as it had so much history, with people, places and most importantly the buildings. 
I never expected to be in England this soon in my life but I guess it had to be done. The first impression was that, despite the wet, cold, damp nature it is a Pretty country. The architecture is simply mind blowing. People -there were so many of them- were much friendlier that I expected. I had the honour of visiting the Oval couple of times and Millwall football club, which has beautiful inspiring story of working with the community. 
My normal day would involve a lot of walking, this made me go around the city attractions with lovely decos at Oxford street for Christmas, Ofcourse, Greenwich time thing, Big Ben, Buckingham Palace to wave at the Queen - if she had spotted me could've invited for a cup of tea. ;)







Met few friends after along time and managed to catch up over a meal, which was very special because everyone is super busy in London so need some luck to find time.












As I mentioned the place is full of history, the museum simply keeps you "wow" remark consistent for atleast 2 hrs. That's all the time I had for it, I must tell though they've definitely brought the entire countries and cities in their ships to their museum. I'm not kidding!

With the history comes our dearest friend Will, who has his own Globe close to the London Bridge. I managed to grab a ticket to stand and watch 'Cymbeline' for 10 pounds. It was surreal to be inside the globe and a little intimidating. The authenticity was simply astonishing as they only used candles to bring about the effects. I felt so blessed to witness a play in that quality. Guess what! during the break of the play, the lady who ushered me met me and asked whether I'm comfortable where i was standing. And i replied that i was comfortable. Then she explained that there's a lady who wants to go home and wanted to give away her ticket away. i offered to pay but it was an unsuccessful attempt and it was a 38 pound ticket, which i got for free! And Guess what again! it was right infront of the bloody stage - front row seats!! I thoroughly enjoyed the play thanks to her generosity. And I wish I could've taken a picture though.

On the way back in the plane, as I was trying to relax, accommodating the rules of the plane I heard a familiar voice addressing the passengers. This was the voice of the Captain asking everyone to chill and have a good time. Guess what again! He was my uncle! Even though I sent him a message the stewardess couldn't deliver it as she was super busy. However, making a pleasant surprise, he was loafing around the plane and I managed say Hi. Eventually I had the opportunity to have a bird's eye view on the landing, which definitely a result of an extended luck I had. 

All in all, I learned one important lesson after this trip - If you have some luck, "Stretch it"! it can't be that bad.

Super Heroes in the Ordinary World - #2 Crazy Platty

This blog post is about Manesh Jerome Christhumani.
He likes to be known as a Professional Trainer. But to be honest he can be many things - a singer, musician, Preacher, Batsman, keeper, bowler, social worker you name it. For me he's a really good friend, in fact he is one of my best friends.

Our history goes back to the school days when we used to be in the same class. We both did science subjects for our A/L's without a clue on what's going on. That's why we used to hangout with several other friends at Manesh's place - Studying ofcourse ;) We were very focused on passing the exam therefore we visited his place on a regular basis. Anyhow conveniently ignoring the outcome I’d like to mention that none of us were really worried about it.

Even though our lives had different pathways leading to different directions after leaving school, almost all the time you'd find him being very active and very busy. I've never seen him say 'no' to people unless it's food. Despite this hectic lifestyle , Platty (that's what I call him now) and I always managed to find time to hangout.

Platty has many significant qualities, he is genuine, honest, loyal etc. But most of all you cannot ignore his Big Heart. He's one of the most generous people I've ever met. Its sometimes overwhelming to comprehend. When we were in Australia, We did a lot of shopping in K-Mart, I managed to keep my luggage down to 1kg less than the quota but he - had 25kg extra luggage buying gifts for people, over using his credit card. He only bought himself a bag for 2 dollars to take those gifts.

Anyway for me his best quality is his optimism. At one point in my life due to several twists and turns I had very little self esteem, I never believed in myself to do anything. But he saved my life by bringing in some positivity. His simple encouragements inspired me and made me realize I can be at a better place than where I was at that time.  Now, I've become somebody with those humble beginnings.

You may question me, Why is he a super hero? Its simple really, because he has the power to inspire people including myself. Now that is something hard to do.